Much Ado About Nothing: “Every Word Stabs”

Watching Much Ado About Nothing, and expecting the new adaptation of it, it suddenly came into my mind that the play is so full of insults – smart insults – which resemble the things that people nowadays use at school, or at people they don't really like, or really like, but like to tease.

For my personal enjoyment, and hopefully enjoyment of others, I'd like to put some – just some – inspirational lines that might come in handy when you're upset (but please think twice before saying any of these to anyone except you are sure he won't understand it anyway), and their accompaniment in Bahasa. Any damage done is attributed to Shakespeare.

“I wonder that you will still be talking, <insert name or anything you want to call him/her with>. Nobody marks you.” (“Kok kamu masih betah ngomong sih? Ga ada yang dengerin.”)

“What, my dear <insert name or anything you want to call him/her with>! are you yet living?” (“Oh, <insert name or anything you want to call him/her with> sayang! Kamu masih hidup?”)

“Scratching could not make it worse an 'twere such a face as yours were.” (“Muka kamu dicakar-cakar juga ga akan bisa jadi lebih jelek.”)

“If her breath were as terrible as her terminations, there were no living near her; she would infect to the North Star.” (“Kalo bau nafasnya setajem kata-katanya, ga akan ada makhluk hidup di deket dia. Itu bisa kecium sampe luar angkasa.”)

A comment upon somebody's singing: “An he had been a dog that should have howl'd thus, they would have hang'd him.” (“Kalau ada anjing yang lolongannya kaya gitu, pasti udah digantung.”)

This is madness. In the play there are even more witty annoying insults that make people laugh when they're not aimed at them.